Note: Josie is a fictional character based on challenges some higher ed. leaders are facing. Clients’ personal stories are always kept strictly confidential.
Our first phone call
“Hello, Audrey. The quarantine has been really hard on me. I’ve been working from home for months, without much human contact, well… except zoom meetings but you know how that goes… It’s been all hard work and no fun because everything fun has been cancelled! I had to abandon all the goals I had for 2020. I’m stressed, I worry, I don’t sleep well, and I’ve gained nearly fifteen pounds since March. My campus is re-opening now and we’ll be social distancing, or we can choose to keep working from home. Classes will be online, so I am thinking about staying home since the students won’t be there anyway. I don’t know. I get depressed being home so much. I can’t decide what to do. I’m feeling completely lost”
“It’s understandable given the circumstances. Josie, what made you want to reach out to me? Specifically, what would you like to accomplish by working with a coach?”
“To be honest, I don’t even know. I like your posts on social media and I believe you can help me but I’m not sure exactly what I’m looking for. I want to feel better. I want to feel like my normal self. I don’t like myself right now.”
“No problem; let me take a guess and think out loud. Then you can tell me if anything resonates with you and we’ll start there. Does that sound good?”
“Yes, let’s do it!”
“My guess is, when things got serious in March, you had to respond very quickly to the situation. Classes were moved online, staff had to work from home, and nobody really understood what was going on. To try to make sense of the situation and to inform yourself, you watched the news every day and got scared. You had to completely change your way of life. That meant abandoning your vision or goals and responding to the ever-evolving situation. This high level of uncertainty made it hard to be proactive, so daily life became about how to react to the latest news. Does that sound true?”
“Exactly!”
“You see, the trouble with responding to crisis is that after a few weeks or a few months of being reactive, it’s easy to lose sight of our intentions, and to forget to control what is still within our control. What I would suggest is to start by focusing on you, on who you are, who you want to be, and what you can choose to transform within yourself because (1) it would make you feel empowered and (2) you can succeed without needing circumstances to change. Once that’s done, I suggest we focus on your mission at work and how you can serve at the highest level possible. That will keep you motivated and energized. And then of course, we can work on leadership development, personal empowerment, mindset, interpersonal communication, influence, emotional intelligence, and any other subject that comes up during coaching goals. What do you think?”
“Yes, that’s sounds great, thank you. Let’s do it.”
Unlocking greatness
I asked Josie to tell me about the passion she had when she started her career and to describe times she felt highly ambitious. Her energy shifted instantly! She quickly realized her lack of engagement with her work wasn’t because of the quarantine. She remembered how she used to give her job her absolute best when she was younger and had to prove herself as well as when she had a compelling vision and ambitious goals. The lockdown did not create a motivation problem but exacerbated what was already happening. She had gotten comfortable, a little complacent too, and fallen out of love with her job. As a result, she had forgotten what an amazing professional she really was. It was time to help her unlock greatness she already had within herself by reconnecting with her purpose.
Building and keeping momentum
Instead of wasting time and energy dwelling on her current circumstances, she stopped feeling sorry for herself and focused on her vision and intentions. First, we worked on her professional identity, core values, and leadership style. People’s actions are reflections of how they see themselves, so it was important to “upgrade” her sense of self before looking to modify her behavior. Second, I helped her set goals and design strategies to create the results she wanted, and worked with her step by step to accelerate progress and success.
Josie often told me how much she appreciated my suggestions to avoid unnecessary effort and optimize results but confessed she believed the greatest value of working together was no longer feeling alone. The coaching process kept her energized, optimistic, focused, and most importantly, didn’t allow her to make excuses or go back to old disempowering habits. Months ago, she had run out of steam and needed someone unbiased to be on her side and support her growth so that she could feel like herself again.
What this means for you
Can you relate to Josie’s story? Has the lockdown diminished your energy and enthusiasm? If you feel less motivated and less engaged than you want to be, please realize that the pain you’re experiencing now is far greater than the discomfort of trying something new. Habits can be hard to break when you don’t have someone to keep you focused and engaged. I invite you to click here and schedule a complimentary call with me if you’d like to feel like your best self again and thrive in 2020/2021. Talk to you soon.
About the author: Dr. Audrey Reille has empowered thousands of professionals through one-on-one coaching, group coaching, speaking engagements, and online courses. Audrey is the go-to coach for leaders in higher education administration. She empowers them to thrive by reducing stress, optimizing strategies, improving professional relationships, and developing a strong and empowered mindset.