4 Reasons Why Time-Management Can’t Work Without Self-Management

It’s not what you know but what you do that counts

Higher ed. leaders have very heavy workloads and often struggle to get everything done without sacrificing too much of their personal time. They read books and watch podcasts on time management but continue to feel overwhelmed. The problem is that it doesn’t matter how many tips, tools, or strategies they learn; what matters is their willingness and ability to break old habits, change their perspective on situations, and develop new work habits. That’s very difficult to do without a coach to provide structure, support, and accountability, as well as identify blind spots and empowering alternatives.

1.     Organization vs. execution                                        

Being organized is essential but it’s not enough. It’s important to have a clear intention each day in the morning, then in the evening, assess as objectively as possible how the day went. It’s an opportunity to identify issues to prevent in the future. Some are external (e.g., too many interruptions, too many people not following-through on what they were supposed to do, too many distractions, or some people being too demanding, etc.) and some are internal (e.g., spending too much time on one project, avoiding an intimidating task, checking emails or social media too often, spending too much time socializing, etc.). So please, at the end of each day look at what didn’t go as planned and do your best to prevent it from happening again (I am here to help you with that!).

2.     Breaking old habits

People tend to confuse who they are, with what they do habitually. Please understand that your habits are not in your DNA and can be changed. Habits are behaviors that have been repeated so many times that they keep happening without your conscious awareness. But you can decide to observe your thoughts and actions, to become aware of your habits and decide what you wish to keep and what you wish to change. People think it’s hard, but the difficulty is not in doing things differently but in remembering to do things differently instead of being on auto-pilot. Changing your work habits mean observing yourself, which implies being mindful instead of reactionary, stressed, anxious, or overwhelmed. That’s why self-mastery is essential not only to time management but to every aspect of leadership.

3.     Letting go of unhelpful coping mechanisms

All of us have gone through unpleasant experiences and many of us survived traumatic events. When we are challenged and we feel unsafe, we develop coping mechanisms which is perfectly normal. However, what was helpful in the past may have become a problem that needs to be released. For example, having critical parents can lead us to become perfectionists but the stress and rigidity of perfectionism is harmful to the people experiencing it as well as their coworkers. When we hold on to old narratives about what makes us “worthy” it is nearly impossible to stop unhelpful coping mechanisms.

Let me ask you: what were you raised to believe, that is now making your work life stressful?

  • Do you have to demonstrate excessive self-sacrifice?

  • Do you have to please everyone?

  • Does your humility create self-doubt and prevent you from making executive decisions?

  • Do you avoid conversations that could become confrontational?

  • Do you care too much about what people think of you?

  • Do you need to receive constant validation?

  • Are you hesitant to speak up and share your opinion?

  • Are you unable to talk with your direct reports about their unsatisfactory work performance?

As long as you try to lead while being attached to old coping mechanisms, you will struggle. Let me help you identify what is no longer helpful and how to free yourself from it.

4.     Keeping the promises you made to yourself

Higher ed. leaders are typically uncomfortable letting people down but they don’t see what’s wrong with letting themselves down. They may organize their time well, even block off a few hours to deal with unexpected crises, decide to set healthy boundaries, and delegate appropriately, but when they feel stressed, they don’t implement what they had intended. They are protective of their staff but not protective of themselves. They may revert back to old habits, causing them to work long days, and not have time to prepare healthy meals, exercise, or get enough sleep. Let me ask you: are you as protective of your own health and well-being as you of others’? If not, why not? What makes you think you are less worthy? Just because you think you can endure more stress and neglect doesn’t mean that you should.

Bottom-line

So you see, time management has nothing to do with how smart or educated you are. At the core, time management is deeply emotional and rooted in the relationship you have with yourself, which is often the result of unpleasant past experiences. Don’t let what happened to you in the past limit your present and your future. You can choose to become self-aware, let go of hold habits that are hurting you, and embrace new ways to be an outstanding leader without excessive self-sacrifice. At the very least, I encourage you to learn more about how you may be getting in your own way and how to stop (check out “10 Unconscious Obstacles to Effective Time Management and How to Overcome Them”) but again, change is difficult and slow when you try to do it alone. I invite you to click here to schedule a time to speak with me about how we can work together (or how I can work with some of your direct reports) to thrive in higher ed. leadership.

About the author: Dr. Audrey Reille has empowered thousands of professionals through one-on-one coaching, group coaching, speaking engagements, and online courses. Audrey is the go-to executive coach for leaders in higher education administration. She empowers them to thrive by improving communication, reducing stress, optimizing strategies, improving professional relationships, and developing a strong and empowered mindset.