Why You Shouldn't Wait for a Door to Close to Open Another

Waiting for a door to close?

When people are forced out of a situation, such as being laid off, in order to comfort them we say “When a door closes another one opens.” It’s just something we say to be nice but it’s a lie.

Losing a job does NOT open doors. In fact, it often makes getting another job much harder. When someone is let go, they risk feeling desperate for a paycheck, worrying about the future, and doubting their own worth in the workplace.  

The ego gets hurt, confidence plummets, and pressure rises. To make matters worse, the person’s “unemployed” status doesn’t exactly make them look like a catch.

Sorry for the tough love but it’s important to face reality.

What really happens?

When a door closes, we suddenly find ourselves without something that we need, which creates a void and urgency to fill that void. Being passive and avoiding seeing the truth is no longer an option. Finding a new door becomes time sensitive and cannot be pushed back to someday…

A door closing is a wake-up call and a push to look for alternatives. Years later, people often look back and say “Being laid off was the best thing that could have happened to me.”

They were forced to face their fears and take charge of their lives. Now they are in a much better situation but admit they wouldn’t have made the change without being pushed out.

Being comfortable is a risky situation.

It’s not unusual for administrators to get comfortable in their jobs, even when they are not happy. They know they would prefer to move on but they hold on to what is familiar. They rationalize why they can’t or shouldn’t leave. Instead of facing their fears, they create a story in their minds telling them that staying is the responsible thing to do.

They think they can’t afford to take risks because their families depend on them financially, or they have student loans to pay off, or whatever else their excuse might be to cling to their current position.

Sometimes they even tell themselves that their campus would fall apart without them and they must stay for the greater good. And that’s a lie too.

Is your mind working against you?

Do any of the following thoughts sometimes pop up in your mind?

  • “I know everyone and everything here and I am afraid of what I might have to deal with if I go somewhere new.”
  • “It’s been so long since my last job interview that I am not confident I will do well.”
  • “What if I apply for jobs and never get selected?”
  • “I don’t want to have to drive more than 15 minutes each way so there aren’t any other institutions that I can work for.”
  • “My job is secure here but it may not be secure if I go to another college or university.”
  • “On a new campus I would have to learn new processes, learn the culture, get to know the people, and adapt to doing things differently. It may be a lot harder than what I do now.”
  • “It’s really not that bad here. Sure, I am dealing with stress, insomnia, and I recently gained twenty pounds but that’s normal for administrators.”
  • “My college/university needs me and I can’t abandon them. I am a loyal person. I put their needs ahead of mine.”

And the list goes on and on… There are endless ways to rationalize staying put. At the core it’s always about fear but it can be disguised as something noble. Could it be true for you? Are you ready to take an honest look in the mirror?

If you have been thinking about getting another job for more than a few weeks but you still haven’t updated your resume and started filling out applications, you are self-sabotaging!

Kicking yourself won’t give you the confidence and strength you need to succeed. You will need to work with someone who will end your pattern of self-sabotage and guide you to success. Click here to schedule a call with me and we will find out if we are a great match to work together to advance your career. You’ve waited long enough. It’s time for change.

What causes doors to open?

Knocking! Knocking with confidence and competence. Plain and simple. New doors are always available and waiting to be noticed and opened. The key is to look for alternatives even when you are not being pushed out of your position.

If you are unhappy with your job, or if you think your job may be at risk down the road, you owe it to yourself to reflect on what you truly want and do your best to make it happen.

When there is no external pressure to accept a new job quickly, you get to be picky. You get to think about what you really want, position yourself for it, and knock on doors. Most likely, sooner than later, you will find the right door and it will open for you.

Do it on your own terms.

Don’t wait for a door to close. In fact, I promise you the transition will be much smoother for you if it happens on your own terms than if it is triggered by someone else’s decision.

If you are ready to move up to a new position with more responsibilities and a higher income, don’t wait for your immediate supervisor to leave or retire. Get clear on what you really want and take the necessary steps to succeed.

Another advantage of opening a new door without being forced out of another is that you can start creating something new without losing the old. For example, if you dream of starting a business, start it now, part time, while you have a job to satisfy your financial needs. You can devote your free time to getting your business off the ground, without panicking about income.

What door do you want to see open?

Take a moment to reflect on how this is true for you. What kind of opportunities are you waiting for? Is it time to advance your career or maybe start a new one? Are you ready for a logical progression or a radical change?

You have to realize the timing will never seem perfect and if you wait for the circumstances to be just right, you will never take action. Now is the ideal time to make decisions and knock on doors!

If you want to make a change in your career but some old beliefs are holding you back (e.g. you’re not sure you will succeed) or you know you’ve been avoiding making a decision for a long time and need help getting unstuck, I invite you to click here to schedule a complimentary strategy session with me. We will talk about your goals and how I can help you reach them.

It is my passion to empower people like you to create a life they love and find purpose and fulfillment in their career. I look forward to speaking with you and helping you start the next chapter in your career.

About the author: Since 2010 Dr. Audrey Reille has empowered thousands of professionals through one-on-one coaching, group coaching, speaking engagements, online courses, and interviews on international telesummits. Audrey is the go-to coach for leaders in higher education administration. She empowers them to thrive by reducing stress, optimizing strategies, improving professional relationships, and developing a strong and empowered mindset.